Why I Don't Watch the News

Modern television news media has become useless on so many levels. Sometimes I wonder how hard assignment editors have to work just to find stories to fill up their air time. The following video is a prime example of why I don't spend much of my time watching the local news.

Click on the picture below to view the news story; this is reporting at its crappiest:



Aside from the fact that this completely inane story made it to a live broadcast, I find it particularly bothersome that it aired within the first ten minutes of their 8:00 news (see the timestamp above). Where exactly is the newsworthiness of this story?

To make things worse, the City of Gilbert had to add their personal touch of absurdity by having Greg Svelund, the official city spokesperson, comment on the issue by saying, "I think this is something that can be solved with education." What?!

Here, allow me:

Dog Park Etiquette 101:

Lesson 1: Dog poop is stinky
Lesson 2: A lot of dog poop fermenting in one area is even stinkier
Lesson 3: To minimize the stink, pick up Precious' poop
Lesson 4: Should have told you before Lesson 3 to use the plastic bags and not your bare hand, you flippin' idiot
Lesson 5: Don't ever leave the house if you are dumber than your dog

I'm pretty sure that I just saved the taxpayers of Gilbert a lot of wasted education dollars.

In Memory

David G. Clingensmith, Sr.
March 31, 1931 - April 21, 2008

"He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty." Psalm 91:1

We will miss you, Grandpa.

This Has Been My Life:

Saturday, April 26 will mark the end of 44 days straight of this:



In my never-ending struggle to produce even the most minute amount of live, straight-swimming sperm, I have tried many unusual things. Some things have helped, some have hindered, but none have done the job they were ultimately supposed to do.

This photo represents my last medical effort. Time alone will tell if this final path of modern medicine can help lead Heidi and me to the final destination that has eluded us for so long now.

Just so you know, I hate needles. I can't tell you what a hurdle it was to stick this into my body for the first time. In case you were wondering, this shot is given intra-muscularly (meaning that I have to bury the needle to the hilt so that the fluid can be injected into the muscle). Learning to inject myself was definitely one of the biggest fear-overcoming situations in my life.

I love trying to overcome my fears, but I certainly won't miss these needles when they're gone.

I Miss Blogging

See above.